Th world is an ugly place but i know there's smth out there, wonderful.
But am i suppose to search th horizons to dig out its secret potential in how it makes ppl feel?
I'm lost, i'm empty, & i'm struggling in my deepest nightmare, my weakest fear.
I tried finding meaning through ppl's eyes, which betrays their bestbelievedtruth or whatmodesty.
I looked up to th sky to its beautiful clouds to figure what life has written for me.
But they refuse to provide me an answer and just continue to smile at me
while passing by like how everyone else did.
I'm not gonna go whichever way th wind blows,
cause I'm still determined to find my own wonderful.
I listened closely to ppl's chatters and their soulful laughters,
watched their struts and their skips,
th way they stuck their head up high and how they try to hide it down low.
But it too, cannot provide me with answers i thought i could have.
Those 3 honest words i've been yearning to hear, th ones i've been missing;
by time it fades to smth much more uglier.
Smth so menacing.
I can only tell by th shimmer of their eyes, which on occasions,
they tell different stories.
& they thought i wouldn't see th flaws between th lines.
They're meaner.
Meaner than me.
Yes, they are much, much more.
I tried replacing those lines they spoke to me but it become a part of me.
A part of what they did to me.
I guess i'm seasons out of time.
& I guess they didn't know me.
I slumped through th crowds wondering whether there's someone too who has just
my same thoughts, whom have been relying on other's bliss rather than their own.
Someone who's had enough.
Someone who can't find her words to speak.
Someone who can't run away but have always been trying to.
Is there someone putting up a smile when they just feel like frowning?
cause i do know and she's lost her faith of being determined & she now followed
what th whole world did to her.
Today,
All they said to me, all th mysteries, i never did believe.
You know i'll never cry.
No i never will, not me, not i.
Back at you now.
Back at you.